My best friend is the coolest person ever. His name is Anthony. He is five six. He is also white. Anthony is really outgoing. Anthony is also really nice. Anthony is really funny. He ran from Artec South. When he ran I was really sad. I was told he would come back but he didn’t. That’s what really sucks. I miss him a lot. When he left he told me he was going to run. I didn’t believe him so I didn’t do anything. When he ran I got so mad I started to cry. I stayed up all night. Thinking about what I should do. I thought I should of talked to him. But guess what I didn’t believe him. So I messed up not him. I could have been there. So what did I do I went and talked to staff. But all they told me was there is nothing for me to do. Anthony and I had plans we were going to go into the U.F.C. together.
Jaison
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3 comments:
I think that you including those details about your best friend does allow the audience to see an image of him. That is a notable technique you used. One thing that will make this personal experience paragraph better would be a few more details on what you would have told him if you did have the chance to speak to him again. Also mention how long you've know him for. Overall I like the way you talked about the last time you saw him and explained it so vividly.
Jaison this is a very nice piece about your best friend. I really like how you shared your emotions about how your friend ran away. Also about how it has affected you since you have left. There is nothing you could have done, and its not your fault as you have been told.
Jaison-
It sounds like Anthony really meant a lot to you. Sometimes people make decisions that they don't realize affects other people until it's too late. I think you are a strong person for writing about losing a friend, it must have been hard to think about and write about Anthony, that was very brave of you. You should continue writing about him because it can be a good way to express what you really felt about his choices.
Tara
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